The lap

I had the laparoscopy about a month ago. I was really nervous about the recovery.  I read everything from people going to work the next day to being out of commission for a month.
My mom flew in for the surgery and we were able to spend the day before eating bad for us Southern foods and shopping.  It was very relaxing.  I was not able to eat on the morning of my surgery so it's a good thing it was scheduled for 8 am.  Before they gave me the anesthesia they gave me some really good drugs and it was time to say goodnight to my husband and mom.  The surgery went quickly and I was home by 10am.  I was a little sore, but not too bad, I'm sure I was on a lot of pain killers at that time.  The rest of the day was spent napping on and off and the only real pain I had was gas pain under my diaphram and in my right shoulder.  I went to bed at 10 pm and woke at 3am.  I wasn't in pain, I think that I had too much sleep the day before.

The next two days I did not have any gas pains, was light headed upon standing up and experienced discomfort when trying to get off the couch.  I believe that I got my period that day because I was bleeding quite heavily.  I did not take any pain medications, was a little nauseous at night, but was able to sleep about 11 hours.  I was able to drive my self by day 3 and went back to work day 5.  I had to wear comfortable pants and make sure that I did not pick up any children, but overall it was only a minor discomfort.

After my surgery I kept asking my husband and mom how it went.  They would tell me good...but then there would be a silence.  Finally after much instance they told me.  The doctor had found endo on my uterus, bladder, ovaries and rectum. It is considered stage IV when it reaches the digestive system and since the rectum is a sensitive area, the doctor was unable to remove it there.  When the doctor spoke with J Bird after surgery he had seemed unsure of what the next step would be.

On Monday I call the doctor so that he can speak to me directly about what needed to happen next.  He considered the endo to be extensive and thought that I should take Lupron to decrease the endo on my rectum....ok.  So what's Lupron?? Oh, only a drug that would send my body into a "menopause-like" state for 6 months.  The news sent me reeling.  Before surgery I was told that I could go on Clomid the next month and start trying for a baby.  Now I had to wait 7 months to start trying again?!  I bawled in the parking lot of Marshalls until J Bird came over from work.  He reassured me that in the long scheme, 7 months was nothing. We could check off everything we had left on our newlywed bucket list.

So, I resigned myself to the fact that I would be experiencing hot flashes and mood swings for the next 6 months of my 29 year old life.  That is, until I started my internet research.  What I found on the world wide web was not positive reviews of Lupron, in fact, there were many lawsuits against the makers of Lupron because of the damaging side effects. I understand that some people only write negative reviews and those who have positive experiences may never write on the internet.  However, it wasn't a chance I was willing to take.

One option I thought sounded reasonable was the endo diet.  In short it's a gluten-free, soy-free and dairy-free diet.  So, all I have to do is not eat these foods and my endo pain will decrease?  Sounds much better to me than the alternative of losing bone density for the entirety of my life and being a bitch on wheels for 6 months.  So began my endo diet.  Which I quickly renamed my healthstyle.  Every time I told someone that I was on a "diet" they would say, "You don't need to lose weight!" and I would have to explain what I meant by diet and the purpose of my particular way of eating.  The way I started describing it, to avoid confusion, became my healthstyle. My new way of eating, not to lose weight, but to lose any of that icky endo that is still lurking around.

Let's pop my cherry

My first blog entry! How exciting.  First things first I'll explain why I felt the need to blog.  Over the past year and a half my husband (J bird) and I have been trying to get pregnant.  We got pregnant on our wedding night (woohoo!!) after 4-5 months of half-assed trying.  We felt so incredible lucky and blessed.  We had been sorta trying a few month before the wedding at the time when we knew I would not be showing for the wedding day.  When we saw the two lines on the pregnancy test we were both shocked...it was so easy! I spent the next month in a haze...doctors appointments, FitPregnancy magazines and tons of online research.  My brother and his girlfriend were 4 months pregnant so we flew home to share the incredible news with my family and to set up a registry at Babies R Us.  Yes a little early, but we were so caught up in the moment that we could not resist.

Fast forward to 8 weeks.  My first transvaginal ultrasound.  That morning I cooked eggs and had cracked an egg with 2 yolks.  Oh my gosh...does this mean we will hear two heartbeats at the ultrasound?  I hope so!  J Bird and I held hands as the nurse slathered my belly up with jelly.  The room was silent.  The nurse said she would have to get the doctor in the room to speak with us.  Immediately my eyes welled up with tears. The doctor delivered the news that there was no heart beat and the baby was not looking to be 8 weeks.  Heartbreak.  We waited another week to see if possibly the baby had grown at all and it was a fluke.  But it wasn't. We schedule the D & C immediately.

I can't begin to describe all of the emotions that I went through after hearing this news.  At first we were just shocked to get pregnant so fast and now we could not believe that we were not going to be having a baby.  We decided that we were just going to live like the newlyweds we were.  Spur of the moment trips, sleeping in as late as we want, doing whatever our hearts desire.  But that feeling was always there...we want to have a baby.

After a year of trying and no results I went back to the doctor and he prescribed Clomid almost as fast as I told him we had been trying for a year.  No bloodwork, no other questions.  After my first cycle of Clomid I began to experience very painful periods.  Debilitating.  After 3 very painful cycles I spoke with my doctor.  I had began experiencing pain with intercourse soon after the miscarriage and now had very painful periods.  He suspected it was Endometriosis and we scheduled a Laparoscopy and Hysteroscopy.  Basically a surgery to go in, have a look at my lady parts, find endometriosis, and treat the endo by (yuck) burning it off.

In my next post I will talk about the results of the Laparoscopy and what has happened since!